Freedom, Not Free-for-All
What Intuitive Eating really teaches about food choices
If you’ve heard about Intuitive Eating*, you might have thought:
"Wait — does that just mean eating whatever you want, whenever you want, without any structure?"
You’re not alone. This is one of the most common — and most damaging — misconceptions about Intuitive Eating.
As a Registered Clinical Counsellor and Certified Intuitive Eating Counsellor, I hear this fear from new clients all the time:
"If I trust myself, I’ll just binge xyz food forever."
"Without rules, won’t I lose all control?"
*Haven’t heard of Intuitive Eating? Check out this page (scroll down for 8 blogs on Intuitive Eating by yours truly!).
But here’s the truth:
Intuitive Eating isn’t about chaos. It’s about rebuilding trust with your body — something that diet culture has actively eroded. We covered just how toxic diet culture is to your embodiment here (in case you missed it).
Welcome to the first article in a 4-part series on the biggest myths about Intuitive Eating (and tips to help you navigate your own Intuitive Eating practice). Be sure to check out all four articles!
Myth #1: Intuitive Eating = eating anything, anytime, without Limits
At first glance, Intuitive Eating might seem like a “free-for-all.” Especially if you’re coming from years (or decades) of dieting, calorie tracking, “clean eating,” or food rules, the idea of no external restrictions can feel terrifying (I see you, I felt the same way when I first started!).
But Intuitive Eating isn’t about ignoring your body. It’s about re-connecting with your body (embodiment) so you can re-learn how to listen to your body's innate (you were born with it) internal wisdom:
Your hunger - you were born knowing when you needed nourishment
Your fullness - you innately know how much is the “right amount”
Your satisfaction - your body can tell you what feels good
Your emotional needs - you were born knowing what type of soothing helps
It’s not a free-for-all — it’s freedom with compassionate care and body respect at the helm. That last bit about compassionate care and body respect is vital.
Compassionate Care
Yup, I’m talking about self-compassion, again! Because when we’re self-compassionate, we are better equipped to meet ourselves in the difficulty of trying something new, with tender grace for the learning process as well as some of the fierceness we need to coach ourselves towards learning from the mis-steps that naturally occur. Self-Compassion is essential to the practice of Intuitive Eating. NEW research shows that Self-Compassion actually facilitates Intuitive Eating (cool, right)?!
New to Self-Compassion? Check out this blog for more.
What Intuitive Eating Actually Teaches
Intuitive Eating, as outlined by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch, is a framework built on self-awareness, attunement, and self-compassion.
Two key principles help guide this:
Honor Your Hunger: Respond to your biological hunger early, rather than after becoming ravenous (when we don’t meet our needs sufficiently this sets us up for “Primal Hunger” and feeling dysregulated around food).
Respect Your Fullness: Learn the body’s cues that say "I've had enough," without fear of future restriction or access (if we believe this might be our “only opportunity” to have this delicious satisfying food the risk of ignoring fullness is higher — more on this below!).
Instead of outsourcing decisions to external diet rules, you are gently guided back inward — to notice, respond, and adjust.
Research backs this up.
Studies have found that individuals who practice Intuitive Eating experience:
Lower rates of disordered eating behaviors
Better emotional regulation
Improved metabolic health markers — independent of weight loss goals
This isn't chaos. It’s co-regulation with your body.
And… the "eat whatever you want" phase may still happen
When you first give yourself unconditional permission to eat, you might not “easily” find fullness. You might “miss the mark” a lot — and that’s ok! In fact, for many, it’s an important part of developing an Intuitive Eating practice.
Many of my clients initially gravitate toward foods that were once “off-limits” and at times feel somewhat “out of control” around them. This often leads them to feeling quite hopeless about their development of an Intuitive Eating practice. But this phase of feeling dysregulated and possibly binging on formerly restricted foods is normal. It’s a psychological and biological response to deprivation.
(Think of a rubber band pulled too tight — when released, it snaps.)
In Intuitive Eating, we call this the restrict-binge cycle. But it doesn’t just “snap,” it repeats as we cycle through periods of restriction and binging. Within this cycle, any type of restriction can leave you feeling dysregulated or “out of control” around food.
And in counterintuitive fashion, this cycle resolves when we interrupt restriction.
This includes restrictions of any type:
Amount - ie. total volume of food
Type - ie. “bad”/“junk” foods or certain macronutrients
Mental - ie. chastising yourself for foods eaten, or even considering to eat
Stopping restriction isn’t a light switch, it’s a practice (and it requires self-compassion)
It’s important to note that this restrict-binge cycle can happen within a day (ie. restrict all day only to binge in the afternoon/ evening), week (ie. restrict all week and binge on the weekends), as well as over months (ie. restrict for a 30-day program then binge when it’s done) or years (ie. restrict the majority of the time over years and find yourself binging when you decide to stop dieting).
If you’ve felt restricted for a long time - possibly a lifetime, it may take some time (weeks, months, even years) to truly trust that you have unconditional permission to STOP restriction and eat all foods in moderation.
But, given time, permission, and gentle self-awareness, most people naturally rebalance toward a wide variety of foods, including nourishing options (aka they find their way to long-standing nutritional tenets of variety, moderation, and balance).
But if you’re just getting started, remember that there is a recalibration happening… you’re re-connecing with your body and re-learning how to listen. Sometimes as you recalibrate you over-shoot things a bit, and that can feel… challenging.
Tips to help the process:
Trust the process, you will find a new normal!
Access all the self-compassion you can muster as you make your way through the messy middle.
Self-compassion includes tender self-compassion for the moments that are hard as well as fierce self-compassion for the moments you need to access your internal coach!
It’s ok to engage the “bumpers” — ie. it’s ok to set boundaries around “all foods” and lean in slowly. You might make a list of all the foods you’ve restricted and explore incorporating them one at a time at a pace that feels right for you!
How to Start Trusting Yourself Around Food Again
Here are two practices I recommend to new clients:
The Pause and Check-In Practice
Before eating, take 30 seconds to check in:
Where is my hunger on a 1–10 scale?
What am I craving emotionally and physically? Am I hungry for food or emotional soothing? What would be satisfying or helpful?
Am I present with my food, or distracted?
Meal Reflection Journaling
After one meal or snack per day, reflect + jot down:
Was I hungry when I started eating?
Did I enjoy what I ate?
Did I feel physically satisfied after?
IMPORTANT (with both of these practices): the goal isn’t to judge — it’s to get curious. You’re collecting data to better connect with and listen to your body!
PS. The same principles apply to movement, too.
Instead of rigid workout schedules or punishment-driven exercise, Joyful Movement (part of the Intuitive Eating framework) invites you to ask:
What kind of movement would feel good for me today?
How can I move to celebrate my body’s capabilities, not change its appearance?
Some days, the answer might be a dance class.
Other days, it might be stretching, walking, or resting.
Learning to move joyfully parallels learning to eat intuitively:
Both require self-trust, compassion, and attunement.
Final Thoughts
You are not broken for fearing “no rules.”
You have been conditioned by a culture that profits from your disconnection.
Intuitive Eating is about coming back to your innate wisdom — one meal, one breath, one choice at a time.
Freedom isn't about eating whatever you want without thought.
It’s about choosing what supports your body and spirit — because you’re finally listening.
You are capable of rebuilding this trust.
And you don't have to do it alone.
Onward in thriving,
Gillian
Coming Next in the Series:
"Yes, You Can Care About Nutrition Without Obsessing: How Gentle Nutrition Fits into Intuitive Eating."
Stay tuned!
How I needed to read this! My first attempt at reading this I burst out into tears and had to come back. But I really needed to hear all of this again! Thank you so much for this work you do! So grateful I found you!
Self compassion and self trust are real topics. The process is messy in my experience. So many myths and untruths that live in my past and surface to the top with just noticing and no judgement. It is a pleasure to walk this path with your genuine expertise and knowing. I am moving forward with a feeling of understanding even if the mud is still a little thick 🫶🏻🖲️